"unmasking my mystery guy"

ELEVEN

The next day, i met Ivan at the movie house. i didn't wanna watch a movie so i invited him to take a stroll in the park. so we talked, about a lot of things. after a while, i decided to go direct to the point.

"Ivan, do you love me?" i asked him seriously. he laughed as he took my hand.

"Ann, what kind of a question is that? of course i do! ever since the first day i met you. why?"

"I thought about this, about us...it just isn't right. you and me, it's like we don't make sense." this time Ivan's face grew serious.

"What's wrong Ann? tell me and we'll fix it. please."

"Ivan, i realized something. and maybe, i realized it a little too late. but still i don't wanna lie to you. i thought i was falling for you. i mean, i tried...and i thought i did love you. but lately all i could think about is how wrong this is..." i expected him to get mad, but he didn't. instead, this is what he said,

"I understand, Ann. i know from the very beginning that you're in love with James." i was astounded. what made him say that?

"Whaaat?!! what are you talking about? James is my best friend, no more, no less." Ivan gave me a sad smile. then he continued,

"It's quite obvious when you're on the outside, looking in...i mean, when we're together, he's the one you always talk about. when you see him, i notice this special glow in your eyes and when i say something bad about him, you contradict me. and remember when i called him a sucker?" i nodded..he went on,

"Well, i explained to you why i did that but i knew deep inside that you were on his side. when i thought you were finally mine, James was always there between us. it's like, there's this invisible tie that binds you both. it's unbreakable...and i realize, i could never compete with that." i was stunned. and Ivan made me realize, that it was true. all this time, i was in love with James. with my best friend. it made me pause in awe and at the same time, scared me. coz i knew, it was too late for us. James already fell for Devon...

"I'm sorry, Ivan...what more can i say? you just spelled everything out for me. but, you are special to me..and you always will be. coz you made me realize my true feelings. i couldn't ask for a better friend..." Ivan smiled at me. then we hugged each other, possibly for the last time.

"Ann Li, i do hope that James will realize what a gem you are. if you were mine, i'd never do anything to hurt you."

"I hope so too, Ivan...more than you'll ever know." after our heartfelt conversation, Ivan took me home. i felt great coz even after everything, i'm certain we will remain as friends. and the best part is, he understood me. he is really a good guy after all. then i remembered something.

"Ivan, i want to tell you something."

"What about?"

"Well, before i met you, i had this weird dream. i was dancing with a guy, only i didn't see his face. all i saw was his gold watch, and it's the same watch that you own..." Ivan gazed at his watch and then asked,

"Really? well, this is a gift from my dad. he bought two, actually. one for me and one for his other son." we were silent for a while when we reached home. finally, Ivan spoke up,

"So, is this goodbye?"

"Of course not, Ivan. no matter what, i'll always be your friend." he grinned. and gave me a kiss on my cheek. then he turned to leave. but before he left, he said something that made everything fall into place,

"Hey Ann, before i go, i want to tell you something too,"

"What is it?"

"That i think James feels the same way about you." i smiled at his comment.

"I hope so, Ivan..."

"And lastly, James...is my half brother." then he turned and left. i was so shocked to hear him say that. and now, it all summed up. now i understand why they know each other from way back and why they hate each other. it's because they were half brothers. i knew that James' dad had an affair with another woman before, but he never told me about his half brother. and now, i finally understood my strange dream months ago. the mystery guy wasn't Ivan...it was James, wearing the same gold watch given to him by his dad. before i went to bed that night, i thought about what Ivan said. that James feels the same way towards me. how i wish that's true. but it's too late now. James already had a girlfriend. why is love like that? why is it that you only realize the worth of someone when he's no longer there? and why is it that when i love someone, he always ends up with Devon? and why, oh why, of all people, do i have to fall in love with my best friend??? never ending questions filled my mind until i dozed off to sleep.